You guys, when I say I was addicted to social media and my phone, I mean it. I was addicted. I had my “ah ha moment” back in May. It was getting to be too much and it was affecting my quality of life, relationships around me and my mental health. No joke, it really was.
My oldest daughter was also experiencing some struggles herself and social media was not helping her during this time. After a pretty vulnerable conversation with my husband who, as kindly as he possibly could, told me I was not being my best version of myself I decided enough was enough. I was so tired of my mindless scrolling, the constant comparison of what others were doing, where they were going, comparing it all to what was going on in my own home.
So I told my husband, and myself, that I was going 30 days social media free starting that day. I think we both kind of laughed inside because really, it was that bad we both had doubts that I could actually pull it off. Well I am happy to report that I not only did it, I kept it going for longer than the 30 days and even though I am “technically back” it is NOT as often as it once was.
What did I learn during this time?
I would go about my day and think funny things to myself like “Why do my children sleep in on school days but on weekends when they are up before 6AM?” I would want to post this thought on social and talk about it with my community. Instead I would just ponder the thought myself and text one of my mama friends who agreed that it was true, children just have this sick sense about them that mess with us parents!
Family definitely reached out and said that they missed the pictures and stories about the kids, but during this time, I actually didn’t take as many pictures as I had been. I realized that when I was trying to capture the “moments”, I actually was missing moment because I was so focused on the perfect picture to post, I wasn’t actually living in it. So I started taking pictures in my mind. I would focus in on all the small details, the sounds I was hearing during that moment and sat in it and let it fill my heart with so much happiness. These moments become beautiful memories etched in my brain and my heart, no Shutterfly album needed.
Also, it made me realize when my family reached out that all we had to do was pick up the phone and call or Facetime each other. It’s amazing how phone calls have gone away now that everyone really leans on social media to keep us “connected.” This is something I am currently really struggling with to be honest! So much so that I am currently working on a whole post about it now! Stay tuned.
What did I miss about social media?
During this little break up with social media, it really allowed me to think about what I truly missed about the different platforms. I missed when I read an amazing quote, I wasn’t able to share it with my community and have the words impact them the way they impacted me. I wasn’t able to share podcast that resonated with me or books that are must reads for those trying to be their best version of themselves. I was missing the connection of sharing with my community the tools I was learning while trying to be the best version of myself. My husband then asked me, why don’t you create a more intentional way to get this information out to those that liked to read those things from you? Why don’t you start a blog? If I could insert an emoji face here it would either be the hand slapping the face like “duh” or it would be the face with the big wide eyes saying “what?!” After I processed it a little more, I realized he was right. Everything I missed about social media, I COULD be more intentional and share with those that may want to hear it. So, yes, my social media break actually was the creation of this blog. Crazy right?
Will I go back to social media?
I have gone back into my social media accounts since originally creating this post. It is not in the same way it was though. I still do not post a lot and I actually don’t find myself mindlessly scrolling. I have certain times that I have allotted as my time to log in. Most has been as a resource for creating the blog as I have some communities I am leaning on to help me learn and grown and land this blog. I’m not sure what the future looks like though for my social media relationship as I will certainly be leaning on it to help me promote my blog to others to read. As far as a personal presence on social media, we will see what that ends up looking like.
As a family we have put some pretty great ground rules together for the whole house to abide by. The best part is my daughter actually created them. The rules are visibly posted on our fridge as a reminder and if one of us break one of the rules listed, the other members of the family kindly remind them as they are doing it and we move along.
How has this break helped me be the best version of me?
I will be honest, my mental health has never been better. The amount of comparison I was doing to myself looking at what other people had going on and shaming myself and what my life looked was STRONG. It was not healthy and we all do it. One day I will write a post about this because it does not serve you. It does not make you the best version of yourself I promise you that. If there are people on social media that you follow that when they post it hurts your heart or you get upset, unfollow them. Why are you even doing that to yourself? And yes, it might be a really good friend or it might be family. That’s okay. Your mental health should mean so much more to you than the opportunity to see and compare what others are doing. It is so hard, it really is, but you cannot compare your current self to other people. PLUS, who knows what is really going on in their lives. They are only portraying what they want you to see.
So tell me, what do you think, would you give it a try? Social media free for 30 days? Do you have the willpower to do it? Let me know in the comments below if you have already broken up with social media. Did you find that it helped to improve your mental health? Did you feel better? If you haven’t broken up with social media yet, does any of this resonate with you? Do you find yourself mindlessly scrolling? Comparing yourself to others?
Do yourself a favor, stop comparing yourself to what everyone else is doing and achieving. Your life is about creating the best life for you, not someone else. Your goal should always be to become a better version of yourself then you were yesterday. I promise, you will find happiness once you stop comparing yourself to others.
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